THE LIGHT WITHIN US…NOT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

THE LIGHT WITHIN US…NOT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

This thing called the virus or more famously called the Covid-19 may have steered in panic even so, surprisingly there’s calm within all of us- emotionally and spiritually. We’re unsure of supplies or cash or what lies in the morrow…yet; the peace we feel is unmeasured. I’m sure we haven’t felt this quiet, relaxed and peaceful in a long time. In spite of not knowing how we’ll bounce back the smiles within are warm.

I’m sure we’ve used this time to engage or re-engage with people we’ve lost connect with, picked up a hobby, learnt a new skill, upgraded ourselves, got better at what we already know and if you haven’t then what are you waiting for? You still have the time, so get going NOW!

I had a lot of plans in the first week of the lockdown just like the ones I’ve mentioned above, reading and learning being on the top of the list, however a fresh outpour of work has kept me on my toes. Work has always been our primary focus in recent times, so this time around I worked on my curiosity and never-ending quest to LEARN, for one, I’ve upgraded one of weakest skills and the one I prefer to shy away from- creating dynamic PowerPoint Presentations and realized it is indeed interesting though time consuming, another 2 certificates up my sleeve, and a few random thoughts that will materialize by the end of this quarter.

Spending a lot of fun time with the family, walks and spot jumping at home, board games, foosball, spring cleaning and oops.. following the world—cooking, not home chef yet, however trying my hand at dishing out delicacies (sometimes) and experiments that are forced down the kind throats (most times ;))

Family time in the evening is a board game of Ludo most days and just like the game, we’re safe only when home.

While scribbling, a fleeting thought of the poem ‘Leisure’ just crossed my mind. And I realize that ‘Life’ has finally given us the time to breathe a bit and stare- stare into a scary, brutal present, the economic meltdown; stare into a transitional future where our planet is undergoing it’s much needed healing.

I hope we can truly heal as well, and be able to slow down a bit so that we never have to stop in this way. While we heal, I hope we can renew ourselves of the physical, mental and emotional hurt and pain and come out triumphant. I hope we’ve renewed old ties, learnt and upgraded in some form.

For now, STAY HOME! STAY SAFE!

Easter- Resurrection Sunday

Easter- Resurrection Sunday

I asked a colleague (read sunshine) to pen down a few words for our Easter greetings to the world, after she did so and got my approval, the other colleague (read morning glory) who enjoys seeing me under heaps of work, asked me to add to it and create a blog. ‘Just saying good, isn’t enough, we’d love to see you add your royal touch (read wise crack, better still ‘tadka’) in it.

At first I wondered, Easter blog… I’ve always only wished people with a few words/lines. However, I realised that this Easter deserved a whole blog post of its own, so here I go….

In our life today, filled with daily video chats, online presentations, deadlines etc. - we’ve all forgotten to acknowledge that Easter is hopping this way!

Easter season is about love and joy in abundance as is the efforts put in it to make it memorable. The Holy week that takes repentance to the next level leading into the last 4 days of religious rites. The traditional festive fervour in the neighborhood is heightened by the delicate aroma of some of the tastiest dishes. The zeal is infectious as families gather to decide the tentative Easter lunch, the upholstery and décor and all that goes into the Easter basket.

This year, though Holy week started on the same note, the weekend didn’t feel the same. Just as we got spiritually ready for the Easter service, we got to know that we lost a loved one to the pandemic.

This year, Easter is different. Virtual masses, spiritual Eucharist, telephonic wishes. We’re just maintaining safe distance so that our loved ones are safe, so that our city, country and the world is safe.

All those who are celebrating the festival and those that are not, it is a blessing to be sharing a wholesome meal with your family, to be with your loved ones, to be safe and nestled in the comforts of your homes for there are thousands who aren’t that fortunate!

As we celebrate Easter 2020, we see the world united for the first time at least in the last 4 decades of my life. We stand united in fear of an unknown tomorrow, not knowing if our world will withstand the devastating impact of COVID-19 yet with the hope of resurrecting from its devouring fangs.

Let’s all just pause and reflect back upon Jesus’ sacrifices and honor his resurrection from the graves as we all, irrespective of our caste, creed, religion- must hold hands and recognise this phenomena together and fill up our Easter baskets with eggs of joy, satisfaction, selflessness and most importantly, love.  

Let’s finally pray for our leaders rise to this challenge and share responsibility among each other while promoting unity, for the many who are grieving the loss of their loved ones, for the multitude fighting the virus and for the larger number to be enlightened and work with the government to fight the pandemic so that we all cross this tunnel of darkness together into the light of hope and a brighter tomorrow.

Let’s all begin to recognise our lovely and positive life, starting today; and live it even more beautifully because ‘Easter spells out beauty, the rare beauty of life.’

Sharing- An important value that helps growth!

Sharing is an important life skill.

Learning to share is vital, which is a challenge for many young children. They need to develop it as it is required while they cooperatively play and learn.

Sharing teaches compromise and to be fair, it teaches them to negotiate when required, to give and take and most importantly to cope with disappointment.

Young children are focused on their own feelings and want things they see for themselves. They need to be taught to share with grace. This skill needs to be developed slowly with utmost care and patience. However it needs to be developed, after all, this is the skill that we carry into adulthood.

Helping your child share means demonstrating the act yourself. After all, children do not listen to adults, they follow them.

1-    Encourage the child even if they snatched a toy and say something like, “I know you took it as it is so lovely and colorful. I’m sure ‘child No.2' wants it for the same reason. Would you like to give it to him to see and feel it as well? Then you can take turns and bring out another toy that can be used together. You can turn to the other child and say, I understand waiting is difficult, however, when you get the toy, you’re going to enjoy it more.

2-    Provide the emotional support the child may need. They are bound to get teary and feel disappointed. Children need to feel understood. It may be important to acknowledge their emotion and validate it. They will feel accepted.

3-    Help the child find a solution. Get them to talk to their siblings/friends and come up with ways to work out the situation. Here it is important to support both children. If we can encourage our children to be problem-solvers and create win-win situations, it will help them grow up to be compassionate and empathetic.

Some more things that can be done-

- Start sharing things with the family/friends in front of children so they can see that it is perfect to share. Also share with the child. You can start with sharing food or a book or a pencil with the child.

- Encourage and praise them for even an act of sharing that they’ve demonstrated.

- If they are reluctant to share, give them space and help and encourage them. Do not give up as it is difficult for them to share at first, slowly with time, they will learn and understand its importance. However remember not to get disappointed yourself and give up. You have to coax and cajole the child into sharing by demonstrating it even more. Talk about the benefits of having more toys when they share. Take them to libraries and toy stores where they have to share what they have in order to get what they want.

- If the child still doesn’t share, you may want to take the toy temporarily and not allow either child to play with it so they understand the consequence of it.

As they grow, most children learn to share especially when they want to use what another has.

So let’s be patient! Encourage and praise and let’s not give up. Let’s not make our children selfish else they may find it difficult to cope up when they grow.

Feedback- Is it necessary?

Over a month ago, a pleasant morning conversation over coffee with heads bobbing out of the newspaper started with the monsoon condition, moved on to the string of controversies over packaged food (that seemed to have surfaced after the instant noodle muddle)and continued with a healthy debate over the article in the Ascent about “30 DAYS AND GOING STRONG”- all about feedback to new employees after 30 days.  

There was a difference in opinion which always streams between Operations and Training, if I may say, and when they live under one roof, the discussion goes on even after a consensus is reached.

So that brings me to the prime question- Is feedback to an employee who is about 30 days old applicable?

To immediately answer that question, from a Learning and Development perspective, it is important and appropriate.

Let’s dwell more on this- The misconception of feedback is largely prevalent among many as being a process of correcting people when they go wrong. Some of our concerns with giving feedback so early are- the person is still learning, what is the use of feedback so soon? It is too early, let’s give them time and space to understand before we can correct them.

Feedback is not always about telling people where they go wrong, on the contrary, it is an ongoing process to create openness and transparency; to inform people what they are doing right and what isn’t going well and how they can improve. Giving and receiving feedback builds trust, removes interpersonal barriers, and can guide people toward higher performance, thereby accelerating ones’ career.

Understanding that the first few days of work are always loaded with excitement, anxiety and aspirations, it is nice to make the employee feel welcomed, checking on them about their development, guiding them through their initial hiccups etc. are always good for the organization as also for the manager.  In fact, the 30-day feedback is gaining momentum in many organizations.

Feedback should be positive and this must be given to people to make them comfortable and valued. It is rewarding for people to know that they are making a difference, however small it may be. Feedback needs to be specific toward a positive outcome instead of being a general comment which is usually made. When feedback is given immediately after the action has occurred, chances are people will acknowledge, accept and improve if it is an area of improvement; whereas, if positive, they will be motivated. Productive feedback requires giving it frequently.

Remember, negative feedback puts people on the defense and that can start the blame-game.

However the context of the feedback, always follow it up with corrective, suggested solutions. Feedback is incomplete without an outcome or solution as there is a possibility that the receiver didn’t know the right way and may need help with it. A follow-up to know if the receiver is on the right track and has understood things is important and needs to be scheduled rather immediately.

A cherished experience

Everything that begins must come to an end and so has my journey with an Engineering Consultation Firm I started work with 5 months ago on Effective Communication- a 3-month journey that extended to 5 due to unavoidable circumstances.

I remember the first day…I was welcomed by some skeptical gazes, some rebellious, some full of anxiety, yet all co-operative at the word; GO!

This workshop was my first full-fledged journey into Facilitation, with a lot of Drama and Improv techniques- which I've learnt in the latter half of last year. (I could say thank you all my life to the person (I consider my mentor) who introduced me to these wonderful tools and techniques but it'll never be enough, so here I am implementing one thing at a time, extending my journey slowly and steadily toward a more confident self.

This course was extensive, well designed keeping in mind the audience(mid to senior management) who needed development in all areas of Communication- verbal as well as written. This module had a lot of hands-on activities which churned around participants from the initial fear of facing the audience to be able to speak in relatively simple English.

Right from developing a shared vision, to relating with developing Ownership, from Basic English Exercises to extensive verbal practices using a lot of Improv techniques to a few Drama ones, from knowing e-mail etiquette, demonstrating them to writing rigorous emails, the team grew leaps and bound and seem to have enjoyed every session.

Post the 5 months, I saw convinced looks full of trust, joy and confidence. The feedback I received was tremendous. That last day saw cheerful faces full of gratitude- gratitude that touched the heart with warmth and satisfaction. The last few moments with the group was full of chatter, songs, a truck load of thank you…. a brief yet memorable celebration with a gorgeous token of appreciation.

As for me, I thoroughly enjoyed every session with the team, who made me their friend, mentor & guide.

With a wonderful feeling, I left that place!

Passion-That Driving Force!

Passion-That Driving Force!

Ever wonder what the hype is about this word-PASSION!

So what is passion, after all?

Passion comes from the Latin verb ‘Patere’ which means to suffer. It is an intense emotion felt toward a person or thing; a compelling enthusiasm for something.

I've always believed that I have a flair for communication- reading, speaking as well as writing. The last one, for some reason, has always eluded me. I've held the pen in hand many a times but have hardly been able to pen down a few lines.  Finally here I am, all set to write on a topic that I identify with completely.

I see a lot people toiling away endlessly- day in, day out- content doing what they are, the way they are, and I always wonder how. I identify with the simple ways of life but somehow it has never been enough to ‘just work’. I've always pushed myself to learn, to try, to explore, made a lot of mistakes but learnt a whole lot of lessons. I enjoy taking risks as they help me understand a whole new side of me as well as learn things from a different perspective. I love to take responsibilities and grow. Though I have met people who are passionate about work and their goals, I've seen many more who seem to prefer monotony over passion (kaam chalao). If things are working well, why unbalance the equilibrium. But is that really an effective way of achieving amazing results; is that the criteria of getting an increment or a promotion?

The secret ingredient to being successful is PASSION! It has to be a self-driven, intrinsic form of motivation or zeal. Constant doses of motivation may help, but if it doesn't come from within, it may be insufficient, however much one wants to fill that jar of motivation for you.

Remember, people become successful because they LOVE what they do. Their burning desire to succeed pushes them beyond limits.

No job is below one’s dignity, if you have to step down and get it done for it to be correct, do it. It’s this passion that will not allow you to accept it any other way.

Whatever your call is, do it so well, that you are recommended by people; that people may want to give you another chance (if needed). I once read about a salesperson who did his job so meticulously that his client followed him to his new company after he quit his job. Regardless of your position at the workplace, bringing passion to your work is like laying the foundation to success.

Passion is that deep, moving emotion from within, which drives you to apply your skills and energy unconditionally into your work. The reason for your endless success after you've identified your purpose.

So remember,

• Identify your purpose
• Make it your goal
• Plan ways to achieve it
• Chase it with immense determination till you achieve it
• And finally, always stay motivated! Stay Passionate about your dreams!

One thing I've learnt- Passion never goes unnoticed.