SETTING GOALS TO IMPROVE PERFORMANCE for STUDENTS

 

SETTING GOALS TO IMPROVE PERFORMANCE

AVOID BURNING THE MIDNIGHT OIL

“If you don’t know where you are going, any road can take you there” – Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

The current education system has parents prioritizing their childrens’ future over all else. The quest for affordable, accessible education is an on-going challenge.

The diverse curriculum today, requires students to be more engaged and devoted to their studies. Unfortunately, at this age students are distracted by the evolving facilities at their disposal. This is where setting and achieving goals become important criteria for students and parents and teachers need to encourage, guide and help them in the same.

In this blog, I am going to talk about goals as a 2-way process

1-     Setting Goals to improve performance

2-     Steps to achieve them

Knowing what a student wants to achieve, will help them understand what they need to concentrate and improvise on.

1- How to set goals to improve performance-

Set clear and tangible goals- Create goals that are clear, sharp, defined and specific. Writing down a grade in a subject for a term (Unit/Term Tests) with a deadline to achieve it is better than saying, “I need good grades.” Note that you should increase your grades a notch higher based on where you currently are as it motivates you to push a little more and remember not to compete with others. The competition has to be with yourself. The key to following your goals is to write them down and this is your first step.

Create a Timetable- While creating a timetable, as thumb rule always keep about 25% time vacant so that you can use it when any ‘emergency’ crops up. Stay focused with your task at hand and avoid distraction as much as possible. Use a checklist and schedule your day in a way that you don’t tire yourself. You will need to schedule tougher, core subjects at the start of the day and lighter (fun/ subjects that you like) for the latter half of the day.

Make your timetable bright, interesting and fun, you can also create a soft copy using pictures, videos, music.

Remember to make time for sport, activities and play.

Set deadlines- Setting a deadline can be a challenge because we do not tend to measure goals regularly and therefore it is easy to put things off for another day. We need to let urgency set in- setting a deadline will bring in commitment which in turn kicks in focus and you find ways to do it.

It is important to break the goal into bite-sized chunks within time frames to achieve more and feel satisfied every day.

Monitor each day- At the end of each day, monitor what you have achieved and set your plan for the next day. This is an important step to keep your eyes on the goal. Know that each short-term goal takes you closer to your long-term goal.

 

2- Steps to achieve your goals-

Take the first small step- It is easy to procrastinate however if you wait for the right moment, it may never happen, and you will lose your trust in goals. Take the first step even if it is small and most times, it always is.

Build the knowledge and skill you need- Now is the time! Learn a new skill, read, attend a class, and upgrade your knowledge. Find fun ways to study. Overcome your fears- you will grow when you try things you are uncomfortable with. You will fail many a times, just remember, NEVER GIVE UP. Review and fix your mistakes, dust yourself and move on. Remember that opportunities wait at the end of your comfort zone.

Stay focused and motivated- Distractions may be galore, it is however important to stay focused. Keeping your phone away from you is critical here- especially staying away from social media. You will need to create little incentives for yourself as a form of reward that will keep you motivated.

Creating a buddy system will keep you motivated as you will have an accountability partner, just remember to concentrate on the goal.

 

Goals are important and help you concentrate on what’s critical. The most beautiful part is that it forces you out of your comfort zone, allows you stay focused and meet your potential. Don’t wait before it is too late, take that first step to see the difference.

 

CHANGE MATTERS- WORK TOWARD IT

Change is at the core of any business and is vital to survival in this competitive time. Having said this, most people are averse to change, especially conscious change, which means that they would rather stay in their comfort zone than take the leap of faith into the unknown. That literally means that they would rather let life control them than be in control of their life. Instead of being proactive, we prefer to be reactive most times.

 

People resist change because they believe they are uncertain and fear adapting to new ways. We all have an innate need for security and the uncertainty that comes with change is not welcome.

 

People don’t change by force but by needs that drive them. Change doesn’t have to be a painful process. The initial jitters are normal, in fact, it is extremely normal to initially resist change however it is important to inch toward embracing change, after all, we change every day. We must understand that change allows for new learnings and experiences and an evolved mindset.

 

As leaders, it is important to be consultative and directive in your approach. The concern is that many leaders struggle to motivate and engage their teams thereby making organizational change difficult.

 

Change can be adapted by-

Using the effective technique and pure intrinsic motivation. The points below will help you adapt to change in a better way.

 

1-     Preparation- We need to physically, mentally and emotionally prepare ourselves for change. In this stage, it is important to know the reason for change. Ideate, gather information, get details, run it with teams of key people in the organization. Consider resources at all levels- people and process. Prepare for the current scenario and for contingencies as you foresee them. Great leaders listen to the fears of people and support them as if they were theirs. Talk to people one-on-one as it creates a safe space for people to open up and be vulnerable.

2-     Change requires inculcating new habits- It requires a regular, conscious effort every single time. Understand your values and engage with your ‘fearless’ self. Taking baby steps is the key. The transitional process is always a challenge however consistency is important to make the change a part of your life. Positive reinforcements are often required.

3-     Action time- This is a stage to put your plans into action and living the change however uncomfortable you feel. It will take time so give yourself a good amount of time- about 3-6 months and even more in some cases. Avoid being harsh on yourself. You need to be strongly committed at this stage and stick to your plan however difficult it is. You may witness praise as well as criticism, learn to accept it as feedback and keep pursuing positively. Keep your eyes on the bigger picture.

 

Remember, before you know it, your new found behaviour will be the one you practice regularly. Please note that you may possibly go back into your old behaviour and you’ll need to be determined and focused at all times.

You may try creating a support system to keep you going as positive reinforcement is bound to work. And remember to finally—

 

4-     Stay motivated- Unleashing your intrinsic motivation is the key to the above.  Focus on motivation that arises from trust and interdependence. Create a motivation streak that works around your values and integrity and this will help you stay committed. Embrace what matters to you and you will see your fears reduce.

 

Finally, now that change doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time, allow yourself that time. Allow yourself to fall and remember to pick yourself up and keep going ahead. Things may move slowly, stay patient and strong when the progress is slow. And avoid the negative triggers that keep you from moving forward.

THERE’S HOPE BEYOND YOUR SPLINTERED MIND

What is this feeling? The queasiness, the pain, the guilt- it isn’t real yet it engulfs us.

Happiness is an emotion, so is sadness and anxiety yet the latter are frowned upon.

The ones that mask it well and are able to handle things also collapse, the weak succumb, the tough fight…. This is a myth. It is a disease- a tragically, frightening truth. Anyone can succumb and everyone can fight

We all go through life’s ups and downs- we’re created to be tough. As a man, you can’t melt under pressure, as a woman or worse/better still as a mother, you automatically should be strong—we’ve heard this all. You have no time to allow yourself to fall.

Why this cut throat competition? Why the unnecessary quest to win- to succeed- to be at the top?

‘Log kya kahenge?’ Yeah- what will people say?

You haven’t done your home assignment, you woke up late, you only want to play…. Why stress about so much from so young. Why can we not teach our kids to learn to implement and grow as humans, not study to pass.

I heard kids in my child’s e-class repeatedly ask teachers about their e-books on Day 1. Parents are dismayed on missing 'e-P.E'. When was the last we asked our children to play, run, skip and tell them it was okay to lose, when was the last time we taught them Essential Life Skills like teamwork, self-esteem, unconditional love, trust, kindness, being helpful, forgiveness not forgetting open COMMUNICATION. 

Have we ever told them that it’s okay to pursue hobbies and dreams, not only English, Math and Science? Have we advised them that it is important to at least try, that they may fail and it is perfectly fine to fail, what is important is the effort, determination, focus and the will to finish and learn.

Why are good looks, clear, fair skin, tall, straight hair, standing first, always winning the only important things.

Let children learn while having fun, they are slow and not as focused, they take their time to cope, let’s not pull them down when we can push them. Teach them to fail because life is full of failure, teach them to lose yet not to give up, to be resilient. Teach them UNCONDITIONAL LOVE- not you were good today, you did your assignment, no complains, you ate your food, so I love you….. Save them from this most dreaded mental illness that eats into more people than cancer

Adults can’t cope any better what with the stress to be on the top. The anxiety and stress may lead to depression in most cases.

It is okay to seek help, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. We aren’t ashamed of diabetes or High Blood Pressure then why are we ashamed of Depression? All we need is to be there, to be the ear- to listen to people when they are anxious and help them, be the shoulder to lean on, even cry on. Be the hand to hold them, be their reason to smile. Let them know you’re there and you care before it is too late…..and most times--- it is too late….

The reasons for depression may be many or none that we’re aware of, it may seem like one has a perfect life and we tend to mock them when we know that they are depressed- don’t stigmatize them, it is possible to be depressed. One falls ill whether they’re rich or poor- similarly, one may suffer depression whether rich or poor.

To all you wonderful people out there suffering from extreme stress, anxiety, or depression- Remember, it’s okay to feel limp, crippled, low on energy and unable to cope up. It is the most trying time that can seem like it may never end, to cry at length, to feel incapable of handling anything---however, it will end. What is important is to understand that this is normal and to get help- psychiatric help, psychological help. GO GET MEDICAL HELP!

And remember, it is not because of you. You are not the reason it has happened.

Go out and find help today! Help is just a call away, a message away.

·         Fight! This time to win and conquer the demons in your head!

·         Fight! Because you are strong!

·         Fight! Because you are wonderful and worthy of this life and you deserve to live. Because you get to live this life just once and you have to make the most of it, cease this opportunity and battle your fear!

All we ever need is to love and feel loved, to feel cared for, to know that one is there in case the other thinks they may fall, appreciation. Sometimes just to be acknowledged, accepted and listened to…

LOVE,

LEARNING- Make your commitment today

It’ been a while since I’ve written and today on Tangible Tuesdays, I thought what better than kick-start the onset of monsoon by writing.

I’m going to start with a quote- ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day’ which means great works cannot be done in a hurry. It takes time to create great things. The architectural beauty of Rome didn’t show up overnight thereby teaching us that patience, hard work, determination and persistence are some keys to achievement.

I’m sure you’re wondering where I’m headed to or what I’m trying to get to… While this proverb can teach us much learning, today I’m going to write on something I always emphasize on-the term ‘LEARNING’ itself!

I know you may wonder about the connection to the proverb. So, let me join the dots for you.

Learning is a journey and cannot be achieved in a day. It is a continuous process and must go on.

A lot of times, we are complacent and refuse to upgrade, yes, I use the word refuse- because we don’t think it is important and think the years behind us that bring in experience are enough which is probably okay however it may not let us grow. We tend to close our avenues to growth- physically and mentally. People with a fixed mindset are unable to acknowledge or come to terms with change. They tend to get defensive while receiving feedback and encounter more obstacles that they may struggle to overcome.

Just like Rome wasn’t built in a day- learning doesn’t encompass formal education alone which when complete leads to growth and success. It is on-going and requires one to constantly learn and upgrade. Challenge thoughts, look for alternatives and solutions, and push yourself till you find the answer, don’t allow yourself to rest, and don’t settle for mediocre when you’re capable of better.

Focus on short-term wins that bring tangible results while keeping your eye on the big picture.

By making learning a continuous cycle, you will-

1-    Continue to grow- When you quest to learn, you will inch toward growth.

2-    Enhance creativity- Learning enhances creativity as you will not stop at anything and will always look for ways to be better than your previous self. It stretches the imagination to think beyond and perceive things in a new light to generate solutions.

3-    Welcome failure and you’ll find the ability to bounce back- With learning, comes the need to try and implement new things which may lead to failure. With failure, emerges the opportunity to learn.

4-    Upgradation- In this competitive age, people invest thousands in studying- good schools, colleges, classes for those plump jobs and fat salaries. On getting those positions, most people forget to continue learning, and don’t remember that nothing lasts forever thereby becoming redundant. So, to grow, one needs to constantly upgrade and this comes in from continuous learning.

5-    Expand your horizons- Learning expands your horizons and allows you to think beyond. It allows you think in a different light, through a different lens and allows for a paradigm shift if required.

    Learning is after all a beautiful cycle that only betters our curve in an upward direction if we embrace it.

    So, let’s make learning a natural part of our life. Let’s pledge to learn one new thing every day from anything and anybody. Let’s not let complacency set in; let’s pledge to grow not for materialistic gains but for our personal understanding and success. And just like Rome, we can be magnificent with a brilliant outcome if we strive to learn.

THE LIGHT WITHIN US…NOT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

THE LIGHT WITHIN US…NOT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

This thing called the virus or more famously called the Covid-19 may have steered in panic even so, surprisingly there’s calm within all of us- emotionally and spiritually. We’re unsure of supplies or cash or what lies in the morrow…yet; the peace we feel is unmeasured. I’m sure we haven’t felt this quiet, relaxed and peaceful in a long time. In spite of not knowing how we’ll bounce back the smiles within are warm.

I’m sure we’ve used this time to engage or re-engage with people we’ve lost connect with, picked up a hobby, learnt a new skill, upgraded ourselves, got better at what we already know and if you haven’t then what are you waiting for? You still have the time, so get going NOW!

I had a lot of plans in the first week of the lockdown just like the ones I’ve mentioned above, reading and learning being on the top of the list, however a fresh outpour of work has kept me on my toes. Work has always been our primary focus in recent times, so this time around I worked on my curiosity and never-ending quest to LEARN, for one, I’ve upgraded one of weakest skills and the one I prefer to shy away from- creating dynamic PowerPoint Presentations and realized it is indeed interesting though time consuming, another 2 certificates up my sleeve, and a few random thoughts that will materialize by the end of this quarter.

Spending a lot of fun time with the family, walks and spot jumping at home, board games, foosball, spring cleaning and oops.. following the world—cooking, not home chef yet, however trying my hand at dishing out delicacies (sometimes) and experiments that are forced down the kind throats (most times ;))

Family time in the evening is a board game of Ludo most days and just like the game, we’re safe only when home.

While scribbling, a fleeting thought of the poem ‘Leisure’ just crossed my mind. And I realize that ‘Life’ has finally given us the time to breathe a bit and stare- stare into a scary, brutal present, the economic meltdown; stare into a transitional future where our planet is undergoing it’s much needed healing.

I hope we can truly heal as well, and be able to slow down a bit so that we never have to stop in this way. While we heal, I hope we can renew ourselves of the physical, mental and emotional hurt and pain and come out triumphant. I hope we’ve renewed old ties, learnt and upgraded in some form.

For now, STAY HOME! STAY SAFE!

Easter- Resurrection Sunday

Easter- Resurrection Sunday

I asked a colleague (read sunshine) to pen down a few words for our Easter greetings to the world, after she did so and got my approval, the other colleague (read morning glory) who enjoys seeing me under heaps of work, asked me to add to it and create a blog. ‘Just saying good, isn’t enough, we’d love to see you add your royal touch (read wise crack, better still ‘tadka’) in it.

At first I wondered, Easter blog… I’ve always only wished people with a few words/lines. However, I realised that this Easter deserved a whole blog post of its own, so here I go….

In our life today, filled with daily video chats, online presentations, deadlines etc. - we’ve all forgotten to acknowledge that Easter is hopping this way!

Easter season is about love and joy in abundance as is the efforts put in it to make it memorable. The Holy week that takes repentance to the next level leading into the last 4 days of religious rites. The traditional festive fervour in the neighborhood is heightened by the delicate aroma of some of the tastiest dishes. The zeal is infectious as families gather to decide the tentative Easter lunch, the upholstery and décor and all that goes into the Easter basket.

This year, though Holy week started on the same note, the weekend didn’t feel the same. Just as we got spiritually ready for the Easter service, we got to know that we lost a loved one to the pandemic.

This year, Easter is different. Virtual masses, spiritual Eucharist, telephonic wishes. We’re just maintaining safe distance so that our loved ones are safe, so that our city, country and the world is safe.

All those who are celebrating the festival and those that are not, it is a blessing to be sharing a wholesome meal with your family, to be with your loved ones, to be safe and nestled in the comforts of your homes for there are thousands who aren’t that fortunate!

As we celebrate Easter 2020, we see the world united for the first time at least in the last 4 decades of my life. We stand united in fear of an unknown tomorrow, not knowing if our world will withstand the devastating impact of COVID-19 yet with the hope of resurrecting from its devouring fangs.

Let’s all just pause and reflect back upon Jesus’ sacrifices and honor his resurrection from the graves as we all, irrespective of our caste, creed, religion- must hold hands and recognise this phenomena together and fill up our Easter baskets with eggs of joy, satisfaction, selflessness and most importantly, love.  

Let’s finally pray for our leaders rise to this challenge and share responsibility among each other while promoting unity, for the many who are grieving the loss of their loved ones, for the multitude fighting the virus and for the larger number to be enlightened and work with the government to fight the pandemic so that we all cross this tunnel of darkness together into the light of hope and a brighter tomorrow.

Let’s all begin to recognise our lovely and positive life, starting today; and live it even more beautifully because ‘Easter spells out beauty, the rare beauty of life.’

Sharing- An important value that helps growth!

Sharing is an important life skill.

Learning to share is vital, which is a challenge for many young children. They need to develop it as it is required while they cooperatively play and learn.

Sharing teaches compromise and to be fair, it teaches them to negotiate when required, to give and take and most importantly to cope with disappointment.

Young children are focused on their own feelings and want things they see for themselves. They need to be taught to share with grace. This skill needs to be developed slowly with utmost care and patience. However it needs to be developed, after all, this is the skill that we carry into adulthood.

Helping your child share means demonstrating the act yourself. After all, children do not listen to adults, they follow them.

1-    Encourage the child even if they snatched a toy and say something like, “I know you took it as it is so lovely and colorful. I’m sure ‘child No.2' wants it for the same reason. Would you like to give it to him to see and feel it as well? Then you can take turns and bring out another toy that can be used together. You can turn to the other child and say, I understand waiting is difficult, however, when you get the toy, you’re going to enjoy it more.

2-    Provide the emotional support the child may need. They are bound to get teary and feel disappointed. Children need to feel understood. It may be important to acknowledge their emotion and validate it. They will feel accepted.

3-    Help the child find a solution. Get them to talk to their siblings/friends and come up with ways to work out the situation. Here it is important to support both children. If we can encourage our children to be problem-solvers and create win-win situations, it will help them grow up to be compassionate and empathetic.

Some more things that can be done-

- Start sharing things with the family/friends in front of children so they can see that it is perfect to share. Also share with the child. You can start with sharing food or a book or a pencil with the child.

- Encourage and praise them for even an act of sharing that they’ve demonstrated.

- If they are reluctant to share, give them space and help and encourage them. Do not give up as it is difficult for them to share at first, slowly with time, they will learn and understand its importance. However remember not to get disappointed yourself and give up. You have to coax and cajole the child into sharing by demonstrating it even more. Talk about the benefits of having more toys when they share. Take them to libraries and toy stores where they have to share what they have in order to get what they want.

- If the child still doesn’t share, you may want to take the toy temporarily and not allow either child to play with it so they understand the consequence of it.

As they grow, most children learn to share especially when they want to use what another has.

So let’s be patient! Encourage and praise and let’s not give up. Let’s not make our children selfish else they may find it difficult to cope up when they grow.